Le Journal de M.Câlin - The Hugger Busker's Journal - 07 - 08, 2004

In Response

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Tue, 31 Aug 2004 19:28:00 -0700

Lead with your heart and success will follow!
After 2 days off I headed Downtown to share my hugs with the business set. As I mentioned last week they are a really tough sell, but I sense that if I go regularly they will warm up to the idea. It is a worthy challenge both creatively and personally.

I read the web log of a young woman who had hugged me and this is what I was inspired to post as a reply.

Everyday life offers up opportunities for us to discover more about who we really are, more then meets our tinted eye. It was a delight to read your personal comments about our shared experience. Unique, simple and true, as every moment in a day could be. If only we stopped thinking about doing and just did what our heart inspires us to do. Ahhh! What a wonder we are, we humans, we beings of God, we children of the Earth. We who are lost in our thoughts, drowning in sorrow of our forgotten dreams and borrowed hopes, how we search and yearn for answers to fulfill the gospel of our beliefs when all there is, is our might little hearts. It is there that all the answers, the wisdom, the comfort, the laughter, the strength, the faith, the love that we need to sustain us during our journey in this life resides.

Many years ago life was stolen from me and in that moment of surrender I found my peace, my understanding, my comfort in the knowledge that there is nothing worth appreciating more then this very day, there is nothing worth embracing more then this very moment for that is all there really is, it is all we really have that we can call our own. This moment is so vibrant, so , oh so tender, so colorful in all its hues and tints. Like a sculptor hands molding the moistened earth into an inspired glance of being we use our very being to mold the beauty of our becoming.

A Treat

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Sat, 28 Aug 2004 20:59:00 -0700

My fist self imposed day off that was not weather related. It was time to treat myself to a bit of relaxation and spend some time enjoying a sunny summer day before fall sets in.

Downtown

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Thu, 26 Aug 2004 21:28:00 -0700

Stop for a moment and celebrate your humanity!

I went to ply my tender wares in the center of downtown Montreal for the first time today. The business lunch crowd are a tough sell. Many passed by me, a look of curiousity immerged at the site of this curiously still, 20th century man, but surprise even bewilderment crossed many a face before a smile set in. This stress ridden, pressed for time crowd seemed to relish my proposition but as yet they could only offer up an appreciative smile. They flowed by me weaving and twirling like schools of fish caught in their own currents. There I stood a rock of stillness in these turbulent waters waiting silently arms out stretched, with a warm smile inviting these hurrying people to slow down and enjoy a moment of respite in my embrace.Though there are not many who can for hugs I have faith that this is the right spot for me at this time. Time is what it will take and I have the patience to win them over.

I will be filming some of The Hugger Busker on Labor Day weekend in Old Montreal. I am excited to finally put this on video. I will be tapuing the action and interviews with passer bys and those who come for hugs. I just hope that there are enough people who want top participate with the camera rolling.

Beauty and Hatered

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Wed, 25 Aug 2004 20:56:00 -0700

Celebrate the beauty of this day by sharing your love!

At the end of the day I changed my message to express what I felt.

Your fear of loving strangers promotes hatred in the world!

It has been a very odd day. It was another glorious day, sunny and hot. But very few people seemed interested in celebrating anything let alone love. I tried all kinds of approaches to invite people to accept a hug but no, they were content just looking at me and my chalkboards. I know by most peoples reactions that they loved my concept of sharing love but just not with them. So I ended up leaving earlier then usual because I felt dejected and was a little disappointed in my day. I was not in the mood to hug anyone anymore.

On my way home I walked by an outdoor café where two couples from Ontario who had seen me earlier in the day invited me to join them for a drink. I accepted their kind offer. The conversation was cheerful and lively. After my ginger ale I bid them fair well with some heartfelt hugs and headed home my spirits lifted by the delightful humor of these lovely, kind hearted people. It does not take much to make me happy and feeling appreciated certainly helps. We all need to feel appreciated so next time you cross paths with someone you care about tell them. It will make their day.

Transforming The Shadow

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Tue, 24 Aug 2004 21:08:00 -0700

Sunshine may brighten your day, but a heartfelt hug will brighten your life!

It was a beautiful day sunny and cool. I started early and was in fine spirits. I began my day with a prayer followed by meditation. I decided to chant quietly for the first few hours. Chanting really grounds me and puts me at peace with myself, allowing me to reconnect with my loving nature. The result is that what I offer others becomes more heartfelt and genuine. I have noticed that when I dont begin my day by connecting to the spirit within, my emotional state becomes more vulnerable to outside influences and I tend to react to things with my ego rather then my heart. My ego self is at times snarky, impatient and intolerant of those who are judgmental and egocentric. These are personal traits that I am constantly striving to transform. Everyday we are offered many opportunities in which to transform our shadow self and evolve into more balanced, loving and enlightened individuals.

Respecting The Artist

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Mon, 23 Aug 2004 19:05:00 -0700

Love today and let tomorrow become!

I began late in the afternoon. I was in very good spirits but for some reason very few people seemed to be receptive to my proposition so my mood changed and I got a little down. When this happens I dont take kindly to people who take from me, but dont offer anything in exchange. I reacted rather testily to group of young tourists who attempted to take photos of me and then with me with out asking me or even involving me. What really got to me is that they wanted nothing to do with me or my hugs. I was as if I was an inanimate object, a real statue.

I dont like it when people try to serreptiously get beside or behind me to sneak a photo with me. Sometimes it down right angers me because I find it rude and blatantly disrespectful of me as a person and an artist. I work hard to do what I do and I never refuse someone who asks to take a photo of me or to pose with me, though I do appreciate it if they either hugged me in return or left some coins in my donation tin. Everyday I get more then a few people who want to take pictures or videos and offer nothing in return. In fact these same people are offended when I tell them that they have no right to take photos of me with out asking. They dont seem to understand that it is my art, my creation, my work and that even though I practice my art in public I am not public property.

Just about the time that I was considering packing it in two young men from Toronto, who will be studying the theatre arts at McGill University came by to look at what I was doing. I noticed them watching and told them that though I usually gave hug this was a time when I really need to receive one. They both graciously gave me some really heart warming hugs. After they left I realized that my sprits had been lifted by their presence. I am grateful for those who bring light into my day when darkness threatens to envelope me. I am grateful to God for always sending me comforting souls, messengers or guides when I need them most.

InterBeing

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Sun, 22 Aug 2004 20:16:00 -0700

Sharing your love will bring sunshine into your life!

On several occasion I have written about being offended or even hurt by those who have brushed off or ignored me and my proposal. A positive change has taken place in my approach to those who refuse my offer or those who have dismissive comments or attitudes towards me. My level of acceptance of has grown and I am much more compassionate to others. This change took place earlier in the week. At one point in my day there were several hours where those passing would just ignore me so I found myself standing in stillness for longer periods of time then usual. When this happens I usually go into a meditative state where I become totally aware of my inner and outer world. My physical self tends to melt into the flow life around me. The sounds, the smells the breath, the sensations on me and in me all meld together so that I no longer differentiate between then. My being becomes all that surrounds me as my surrounding becomes me. Unless you have experienced this it is hard to describe accurately let alone imagine.

There I stood in silent stillness in this state of interconnectedness, of interbeing. As I watched the flow of people go by I began to recognize myself in each and every one them. I could see my sad self, my fearful self, my angry self, my hurt self, my cheerful self, my preoccupied self, my egotistic self, my macho self, my exuberant self, my distracted self, my anxious self, my playful self and on and on reflection of my selves passed by me.

The first step to loving ones self is to accept ones self totally, unconditionally, with out judgment. It is then clear then that the first step to loving others is to accept them as they are, totally, unconditionally, with out judgment. It does not mean that I have to like another persons behavior or life choices, but rather that I can be and must be compassionate towards their human nature, their human suffering, their human struggle for it is my nature, my suffering, my struggle as well. I can now approach those who struggle with share affection and tenderness with gentleness and understanding rather them criticism and judgment as I had in the past. I am grateful to God for opening my mind, my being to this profound insight. I pray that I have the wisdom to honor this gift.

An Invitation

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Sat, 21 Aug 2004 22:42:00 -0700

Every day is a sunny day when we smile to the world!

It always takes me a few hours to get into the rhythm of greeting and hugging people. I have been actively inviting people to hug me now rather then maintaining my stillness as before. This inviting approach is very stimulating as it allows me to engage the public more directly and share a dialogue with them. I have taken away a lot of the questioning that people did among themselves when I remained still I always felt that the observer was never certain what to do, whether to approach me freely, or if they had to put money in for me to move or hug them. Now my proposition is quickly clear to them and they can with out more easily decide on what action they will chose to make. Still, many people are still quite surprised by my breaking out of stillness and inviting them to share a hug. Some even look at me as if I was an alien life form who has just invited them on to their space ship. Really I have gotten some very strange looks and responses. Then they hurry away from while still fixing their gaze on me. It is really funny to watch.

This new approach is making me less money because people no longer put money into my donation tin to see what I will do but I have been giving so many more hugs, which is so much more satisfying for me. For people to come and put drop a coin to two into my6 tin after I hug them is satisfying because I know that their generosity is not based on the idea of paying for a hug, which I have been struggling to counteract all summer, but rather showing support and appreciation for what I am offering. Of course I am a busker and this is how I make my living but I would rather receive a little less money and share more hugs and conversations with others. It is the human interaction that nurtures me as an individual and as a performer.

Living By Example

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Fri, 20 Aug 2004 21:01:00 -0700

Live this day without yesterdays or tomorrows and happiness will blossom today!

Living day by day. Being an inspiration to others through how I live my life or through my actions is what I strive for. It is too easy to philosophies, or complain or give advise as we never have to live up to our words though we expect others to adhere to our perception of life. How many times have I heard parents especially father admonish their sons for refusing to hug me yet when I offer the parent a hug they also refuse using the same lame excuse. What a fine example they are to their children. This Do like I say not like I do attitude is terribly hypocritical. I find it sad that a number of parents dont seem to realize that THEY are the primary role models for their children and that their child will end up imitating the parents behavior and attitudes. Should I manage to entice a resistant parent to hug me, their offering it is often brief and cursory.

On the opposite spectrum are the colorful and loving people form the international Rainbow Gathering family have come on several occasions for hugs. I always appreciate their open, loving approach to life and the living. Whether it be a single hug or group hug that is shared with them the energy of love is tangible, even palpable. The aftermath of this sharing of deep unconditional love fills me with a lightness of being that is profoundly serene and satisfying, as if I needed nothing else to sustain myself. If we would all share this kind of unconditional affection to those we love and care about we would lead much happier and fulfilled lives.

The first six photos in the gallery are of me hugging French members of the Rainbow family, I mean family in a philosophical sense. I will also post a few links about the Rainbow gatherings in the links section.

Silent Witness

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Thu, 19 Aug 2004 20:30:00 -0700

Life is beautiful embrace it with all your being!

We do live a truly beautiful existence no matter what the circumstances. It is a matter of choices. So why not choose to appreciate every moment as we would the succulence of a freshly picked strawberry. Its scent, its taste, its texture over whelming our senses with joyful exuberance. It does not take much to make me happy. Sometimes its an Iced Chai on a hot day, or the loving innocence in a childs eyes, or a discarded plastic bag dancing in the breeze, or a solitary midnight walk under the sliver of a silver moon, or just a moment of stillness.

I really find that many of us complicate our lives with so many worries, tasks, distractions that hours, days, weeks pass us by and we wonder where our life went. Even taking a few minutes a day to just sit on a park bench and surrendering to the flow of the surroundings, witnessing all that is. I find that I have been doing a great deal of witnessing as I stand there in my stillness, listening, watching, being nothing more or less than my present self.

To Give And To Receive

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Wed, 18 Aug 2004 22:10:00 -0700

Be loving and you will be loved.

We reap what we sow as the saying goes and how true it is. Since I have been sharing my love with others I have never felt so loved and appreciated in my life. In fact I am a much more open and joyful man then I was 2 months ago. I laugh many times a day and I smile with ease and pleasure. This is new to me and I am taking much pleasure in discovering my joyful nature.

We all desire to be loved unconditionally, we all seek it, and most of us spend our lives longing for it. So why is the love that we give others, more often then not, conditional. Shouldnt we give to others what we desire to receive from them. It is such a simple and basic universal law yet it took me 40 years to actualize it in my daily life. Now when I share hugs I often feel love flowing through me, and I have discovered that the more I give the more consistent and powerful the flow becomes. It is the source of life that I feel flow deep inside me, nurturing my confidence, my sense of self worth, my compassion and my laughter. I am in the midst of embracing, what I think is, the greatest lesson that life has to offer. I am truly grateful for it.

Just Around The Corner

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Tue, 17 Aug 2004 21:03:00 -0700

At times we have to dare if we wish to taste the delights that life offers us!

Another absolutely glorious day in Old Montreal. It was a warm, sunny day with large fluffy clouds swaying in the fragrant breeze. As for the business of hugging that is an other story.

The first half of the day was a very lonely one for me. Though there were a fair number of people milling about very few showed interest in my hugs. Some, drawn by their curiosity would wander by to read my boards or stare at me, but few accepted my courteous invitation to share the human touch. I did what I could to intice them but it was to no avail. After 4 hours of unrequited love I was considering leaving. I dont mind not making any money, but I do mind not giving hugs. I enjoy it so much that being ignored or rejected persistently annoys me and I begin to think that either my breath has become rancid or Ive grown a snout. Though I did manage to get through most of the book I was reading yesterday. The reading keeps me entertained but I am not certain how inviting it is to the observer. It is a nice break from meditation or disjointed thinking. When this happens I begin getting negative and being a bit uppity with people. I dont like it when I get this way. Robert, the flautist that comes by everyday for his afternoon hug reminded me that there is always something wonderful just about to turn the corner and I must be ready to welcome it. This thought changed my mood.

Suddenly the energy in the air changed and the evening turned out to be quite wonderful. People began in a very short time to flock around me to watch and hug. It is in this accepting environment that I become inspired and the loving, joyful energy with in flows out with vibrancy and strength. I find that as a performer it is the audience/public that nurtures my performance. It is their desire to receive my heartfelt offering that lift my heart and allows my creative spirit to soar. The evening ended in the calm splendor of a group hug with 6 children.

Maybe Later

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Mon, 16 Aug 2004 21:54:00 -0700

Why put off until tomorrow the delights life offers you today?

People often respond to an invitation to hug with Ill catch you on the way back or Got mo time now, later for sure. Well invariably they never return. This is why I wrote this message. As we all think that very opportunity that life offers us is there at our beck and call waiting for when we are ready to take advantage of it. Unfortunately life gives you only one shot, sometimes two, at experiencing a transformative moment. I have missed many in my life that I am consciously aware of. There are no doubt countless more that just passed me by due to my lack of awareness. Life proposes, we accept or we refuse is up to us but in the end our personal evolution is in our direct control. So I say it is today that you build your future so why not let yourself be guided by everything that life offers today. We take so much for granted even the fact that we will wake up tomorrow morning. Nothing guarantees that we will so make the best of today and never shall regret be your companion.

On Giving & Reveiving

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Sun, 15 Aug 2004 20:52:00 -0700

Share your love with the world and the world will love you back!

Enough of the statue! It is getting boring for me. To just stand in stillness while people poke at me to see if Im real. So I have decided to entertain using stillness by creating the Anti-statue. Yes the man who it trying to be a statue but just cant seem to control that twitching finger, or that buckling knee or cant keep from scratching the terrible itch under his nose or is just plain falls asleep standing only to awaken suddenly to discover where he is. These and other ideas I will be exploring in the next few weeks. It is important that I entertain myself as well as my audience. Amusing myself first and fore most, then others, through my delight can share in my amusement.

Pleasure, love, attention, amusement are gifts that I must allow myself to indulge in as often as possible. I have a tendency of giving much to others but forgetting myself in the process. Then I get resentful and with draw into myself. The more I nurture myself the more I have to offer others in my life and work. Many of us are great at giving but have trouble receiving or take a lot but give little. I have found that in order to be giving to others in a unconditional way one has to first learn to receive from one's self. One has to feel worthy of love, affection, happiness or whatever before one can actually take delight in the receiving the gift. This is a lesson that took me many years to learn. I learn every day, through the tender attentions of others, that I am worthy of love and of being loved. It has taken me years to believe this as truth, yet from time to time doubt, insecurity and feelings of unworthiness emerge from their darkness to gnaw at my heart.

Chocolate Truffles

info@huggerbusker.com (The Hugger Busker) — Sat, 14 Aug 2004 22:01:00 -0700

You can ignore the precious moments that life offers you or you can embrace them!

I was in fine form today and the weather was truly exquisite. Cool and sunny with a delightful festive energy in the air. People were very receptive to me through out the day. I also had several very interesting conversations with people who were interested in what I was doing. I take more time now to talk with people rather then constantly return to my performance. I am letting myself appreciate the company of strangers who wish to express more then just a hug or a greeting. It is true that I miss out on more hug and possibly some extra dollars because of these conversations but I dont really care as I know that the Universe continually sends me messengers and guides so I try to be receptive to every person that wishes to walk along my path with me even if it is for just a few steps.

My friend Sheryl dropped by this afternoon and brought me some chocolate truffles. Yummm! She is a real sweet heart. Like my friend Mac that I wrote about a few weeks back Sheryl also has a wonderfully sunny smile and delightfully cheerful demeanor that is very endearing. I admire them for their ability to approach living with an open, joyful heart. Though I do not see them often the simple thought of them inspires me to be cheerful and good humored. It is what I strive to for every day while I invite strangers to share a hug with me. It is important to me to have friends in my life that I feel inspired by. I am grateful for their friendship.